I had my first appointment in three weeks the other night. I went in with a great sense of peace and a calm joy. In a really good place compared to where I have been. Sometimes it is best to stop while you are ahead.
First off I got crazy focused on my writing in the waiting room. When Pavel opened the door I jumped. Upside I didn’t throw the pen at him and squelched the scream. Thankfully I did phrase my response to the “Did I startle you?” with “Yep, but I was totally in the moment of what I was doing.”
Great start to the session. I am in a better place. Acceptance, standing up for my needs more, compassion, talked about the blog and how I am working on my spirituality. I was smiling and the fidgeting was almost nil. I mean, seriously, it was impressive.
Anyone else hear that serial killer music in the background that is slowly building?
Then Pavel hits me with the question. What about dating? Sweet LADY! I didn’t stumble to badly and answered honestly. I admitted that I haven’t thought about it and while I do see it in my future I’m just not there yet. Does it stop there? Nooooo. Silly Carleen! The next question: What about sex?
What is up with this?!?! Why is this an issue? *ahem* Sorry.
We have a whole discussion that stemmed from the answer of “I’m not there. I need to get the spirituality settled first. I can’t explain it.” This is followed by being asked ‘why’ in eight million different ways and the request for an explanation in a four-minute time span which I did state I could not supply! Thank you very much!
The thing is I’m still in a good place. Yep, I have to work on it. I know that and some of his questions were valid. What I didn’t expect is that when I ran the idea of knocking therapy back to once a month he latched on to this issue and the horse trading started! Our compromise is two weeks. Which is okay as I kind of have some stuff running around in my head on this.