I have to admit something here. **deep breath** I have been losing my balance lately. No medical reason for it, other than gaining weight back. The issue is adjusting my knowledge of my physical core and the state of muscles. This knowledge of my physical body keeps me from falling. The same goes for our mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.
When leaving my therapy appointment on Tuesday I wiped out on the sidewalk. The two pieces of concrete were uneven and I totally went down. I have a twisted ankle and skinned knee to prove it. When I picked myself off the sidewalk I sat for a few minutes on a nearby bench to assess the damage. No hole in the knees of my Capri pants (bonus), marked the front of my shoes (annoyance), bleeding knee and sore ankle. Nothing broken that won’t heal or can be fixed. Good to go. As I got myself together I started thinking about why this is happening suddenly. Reason is I have stopped working out and my body is reacting to that, but my mind isn’t. Then I realized that my mental state is the same as it also needs a strong core to be steady.
A strong mental, emotional and even spiritual core or center means that you have that place of self acceptance and love. At least that is what it means to me. To achieve a strong core, survivors of abuse and trauma must practice exercises. This means having a trainer. In this case a trainer is a therapist or group support. We need to learn healthy ways to strengthen ourselves. It means acceptance and forgiveness. Not for the welfare of our abusers or who we see as inflicting the trauma, but for ourselves. Acknowledging who, what and where our pain comes from and assigning the necessary responsibility is part of the healing process. Letting go of the anger and hatred is the other part. Again this is not for the benefit of those who caused the pain, but for us.
The lesson last night was that I need to be strong in both my physical and mental/emotional/spiritual core. Having a strong core will allow me to regain my balance no matter what is in my path.