The week has been rough when I am honest about it. Probably a bit longer than that. Just kind of feeling a lot of pressure and while helpful, the blogs about the abuse are difficult. Healing, but difficult to write. Last night I did my normal routine with a twist.
Pretty much every night I do a healing meditation on Jason. Long distance and all. I’m kind of relaxed and definitely tired after. Last night though I added another friend who isn’t feeling well. Not too out of the normal. Then I did something I have never done before. I did a healing meditation on myself. Just me and the Goddess, Universe, the Force (whatever you want to call it) hanging out communing.
Dude it was cool. No, there were no mushrooms, wacky tabcky or anything else consumed.
What is interesting is how I feel today. If I were any more mellow I would a sleep. Seriously. At first I thought there was something wrong. I did the whole “ACK! The depression is back!” Then I stopped, checked in with myself and came back with “Nooooo. That isn’t it. What is this!” Bewildered and kind of panicking I spent my drive in assessing the situation. Do I have a fever? No. Do I feel light-headed? No. Okay how to I feel? Relaxed, good, happy and mellow. All the signs are there. No teeth clenching, relaxed shoulders, small smile on my face, and eyes bright but soft. Nice…
This process of living and healing takes us all in different directions. Being that we are individuals it makes sense. Our path is designed just for us. It has to be to work. My lesson today is that relaxed, mellow and happy are good things and not reasons to panic. Roll on Wednesday. Peace kids.