fun house mirrors (Photo credit: ninahale)

I hate my body. The thing is it doesn’t matter what size I am. I haven’t always been like this bad about it. I have always been “conservative”, but I have to admit that it is down right hate now.

The question is why, of course. The answer is actually very simple. In my mind my body is what got me abused. There is a thought that some how it betrayed me. It is some how responsible for the abuse and then during it betrayed me.

What to do?

My thought is to try to accept it. Not change it, but accept it as it is now. Learn to be comfortable and like my body again. Will it happen? Man, I don’t know. Makes want to run, screaming as I write this. probably not a good sign. I have taken steps though. The first was buying and starting to read Size of My Life by Karen Cigna. What an amazing woman and book. I can’t begin to explain how much this book is challenging me. The second is by wearing dresses.

Sounds stupid, huh?

The idea behind the dresses is that I need to stop running from my feminine side. The interesting thing I have discovered is how much I LOVE wearing dresses! My goodness they are so freaking comfie! Of course I don’t nylons which is why they are.

This is going to be a challenge on so many level, but hopefully I am up for it.

Can you relate?

Peace and blessings.